Out with the old, in with the new? Bah Humbug!
Why is it that old is bad and new is better? I’m old – or at the very least, at 65 years of age I am getting older – but that doesn’t mean I should be discarded. I still have a lot of get-up-and-go in my tank that hasn’t fully gotten-up-and-gone so the old me is planning on sticking around for quite some time.
The tendency to replace electronics, vehicles, and even homes, with a better, shinier, more up-to-date model needs to change. But I’m more interested in discussing how the wonderful senior denizens of the world are being thought of and treated.
There are certainly wonderful community programs and businesses out there that utilize the experience and expertise of us older members of the world’s population, and for those programs I am extremely appreciative, but there still seems to be a bias against anyone over 60 years of age.
In the spirit of true transparency, I’ll admit that when my husband and I are in the car driving behind someone who is traveling way below the posted speed limit, one of the first things out of our mouths is, “I bet there’s an older person driving that car.” Sometimes we’re right, but other times, we are dead wrong.
And then there are the retail clerks who call older women Dear or Sweetie. Oh my, I once filed a complaint with a supermarket owner whose very friendly but ill-advised employee said to me as I was leaving the store, “Thanks, Dear, have a nice day!” I guess I come by my sensitivities honestly as something similar happened to my 50-something year old mother when she had taken the city bus to the government office to renew her driver’s license.
She had just completed the last stage of the visit – getting her photograph taken – when the government employee handed my mother her renewed driver’s license and asked, “Sweetie, did you gather all your belongings? Are you leaving with all that you came with?” That evening, in tears, my mother relayed the story to me, so offended that someone talked down to her in that manner. My mother declared, “I was humiliated!”
Respect is all people are asking for, and that plea for respect isn’t for just those of us of a certain age. Everyone deserves to be respected for who they are, regardless of age, race, gender, abilities, or financial status. The Merriam-Webster online dictionary defines respect as: 1) an act of giving particular attention or consideration; 2) giving high or special regard; esteem.
If people adopt that definition of respect, they will not treat an older person in a demeaning way, nor will they consider themselves better than any other person whose way of living or background differs from their own.
Maybe I sound like a broken record as a couple previous In Your Corner posts pleaded for the same type of behavior, but the thing is, sometimes we need to hear a particular message over and over again before it finally makes sense to us. I know that is the case for me.
So, as we welcome the year 2019, let us all try to look upon our brothers and sisters—whether strangers or known—as equals. If everyone lived and acted that way, what a grand world this would be! Its citizenry would be happier and therefore healthier, and no one would give a darn if someone in front of them on the road just happened to drive a bit too slow for their tastes. Yes, when that happens to me, instead of fighting it, I will honestly try to live in the moment now that this slower driver has provided a grand opportunity for me to appreciate the scenery that will no longer be whizzing by me unnoticed.
And perhaps in one of my future posts, I’ll give you an update on how that is working for me.
The tendency to replace electronics, vehicles, and even homes, with a better, shinier, more up-to-date model needs to change. But I’m more interested in discussing how the wonderful senior denizens of the world are being thought of and treated.
There are certainly wonderful community programs and businesses out there that utilize the experience and expertise of us older members of the world’s population, and for those programs I am extremely appreciative, but there still seems to be a bias against anyone over 60 years of age.
In the spirit of true transparency, I’ll admit that when my husband and I are in the car driving behind someone who is traveling way below the posted speed limit, one of the first things out of our mouths is, “I bet there’s an older person driving that car.” Sometimes we’re right, but other times, we are dead wrong.
And then there are the retail clerks who call older women Dear or Sweetie. Oh my, I once filed a complaint with a supermarket owner whose very friendly but ill-advised employee said to me as I was leaving the store, “Thanks, Dear, have a nice day!” I guess I come by my sensitivities honestly as something similar happened to my 50-something year old mother when she had taken the city bus to the government office to renew her driver’s license.
She had just completed the last stage of the visit – getting her photograph taken – when the government employee handed my mother her renewed driver’s license and asked, “Sweetie, did you gather all your belongings? Are you leaving with all that you came with?” That evening, in tears, my mother relayed the story to me, so offended that someone talked down to her in that manner. My mother declared, “I was humiliated!”
Respect is all people are asking for, and that plea for respect isn’t for just those of us of a certain age. Everyone deserves to be respected for who they are, regardless of age, race, gender, abilities, or financial status. The Merriam-Webster online dictionary defines respect as: 1) an act of giving particular attention or consideration; 2) giving high or special regard; esteem.
If people adopt that definition of respect, they will not treat an older person in a demeaning way, nor will they consider themselves better than any other person whose way of living or background differs from their own.
Maybe I sound like a broken record as a couple previous In Your Corner posts pleaded for the same type of behavior, but the thing is, sometimes we need to hear a particular message over and over again before it finally makes sense to us. I know that is the case for me.
So, as we welcome the year 2019, let us all try to look upon our brothers and sisters—whether strangers or known—as equals. If everyone lived and acted that way, what a grand world this would be! Its citizenry would be happier and therefore healthier, and no one would give a darn if someone in front of them on the road just happened to drive a bit too slow for their tastes. Yes, when that happens to me, instead of fighting it, I will honestly try to live in the moment now that this slower driver has provided a grand opportunity for me to appreciate the scenery that will no longer be whizzing by me unnoticed.
And perhaps in one of my future posts, I’ll give you an update on how that is working for me.
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Irene Frances Olson
Author of Requiem for the status quo, a novel that celebrates and encourages family caregivers of those with Alzheimer’s or other dementia. You can find that book HERE. Ms. Olson is a member of AlzAuthors, www.alzauthors.com, a compendium of authors who have all been affected by Alzheimer's disease and other dementia. These authors share their experiences to bring knowledge, comfort and understanding to those on a similar journey. |
